Oh No, Not Again!
by Allen Blaster
Summary: This is going to be a series of one-shots that center around one of my favorite things to write about. The destruction of the T-Car! If Cyborg ever finds out about this, I am so dead! So please don't tell him for me!
1. Beast Boy's Magic Touch (Allen Blaster)

**In this, you will all get to see the oh so many ways that Cy's baby can be destroyed. Mutilated. Torn apart. Burned. Pounded. Etc. In the most comical of ways that I can imagine.**

 **Now, this is the kicker. I want you, the reader, to offer up the suggestions you think would be the funniest to see. Whether it be Adonis using it as a weight. Or Jinx just getting back at Cy for dumping her in Hive Academy. Any idea, if I can write it, is a good idea.**

 **Each chapter after this will be dedicated to whoever supplied me with the idea for that chapter. Multiple pairings will be used in this story. As long as they are pairings that I do approve of. For pairings I do and don't approve of, all you have to do is look at my profile.**

 **Lastly, I don't know how often I might post something to this. Like I said, whenever I'm getting bored with my current writing. Or if I've hit some writer's block on my other stories. It could be once a week, twice a month, three times a day, I don't know. Just make sure to put down ideas you think would be hilarious for me to write. I notice every review thanks to my email.**

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 **Now, ladies and gentlemen, boys and girls, toddlers and babies, Earthlings and Martians, blah blah blah-ty blah.**

 **I get to present to you…**

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 _ **Oh no, Not Again!**_

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 **Disclaimer: I don't own Teen Titans. And if Cyborg ever finds this, I am screwed!**

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 **Number One:** _Beast Boy's magic touch (By Allen Blaster)_

Cyborg was humming to himself as he used tool after tool to remove the Luthor Corps engine from his baby. The song he was humming sounded oddly like the Titans theme song. Although, knowing him, it was likely that it was his own version of it, and not the original.

' _When there's trouble you know what to do… Call Cyborg! He can shoot a rocket from his shoe… Cuz he's Cyborg!'_

Cyborg was super excited about this upgrade he was making to his baby. An upgrade that required him to remove the whole engine from it. And put a new, improved, and far more efficient one in its place.

While the old engine provided by Lex Luthor himself was capable of getting his baby to speeds as high as 200. And despite how good he always said it had sounded to his ears. This new one he had special ordered months ago was supposed to put his baby in a whole new category altogether.

The Wayne Industries, A-class DCL-300 turbo engine. Capable of getting any car it is placed in to go from 0 to 100 in 3.0 seconds guranteed. And achieve a speed of as high as 300 miles an hour! Capable of making any good driver outrun any cop stupid enough to not order these for their cars!

Despite the top speed, it was also supposed to be far more fuel efficient. While Luthor's old engine gave his car about a 400 mile range at top speed. Far more than any other normal car. The DCL-300 would increase it to 600 at top speed, to about 800 miles if he went at a slower speed of 200 miles an hour!

Not that he ever would go that slow again, that is. Maybe if he was in the middle of the city when it was rush hour. He might slow it down a little bit. Other than that, he would never take his baby slow again!

With all the different screws attaching the engine to the car removed, Cyborg proceeded to use a complex pulley system to gently lift the now obsolete engine out of his baby. He could have done it with his bare hands with his massive strength, but with all the other important gadgets and stuff in his car. From the heat seeking missiles stored inside, to the WiFi Hotspot emitter he installed last months, he risked the possibility of the engine hitting these very important things. So he was left to use a pulley system to carefully navigate the engine out of his car.

It took a lot longer, about three minutes to be exact. But then the old engine was finally resting on a table by the T-Car. Right next to where the new one was currently placed. It looked as black as night, but seemed to shine as if it had been polished over and over again. Knowing Cyborg, he had probably done just that.

Cyborg took a few seconds to admire how shiny it was. Thanking every god he knew of that this day had finally come. The day he would make his baby one of the fastest cars on the planet.

Then he put the new engine on the pulley system. The same one he had used to take out the other engine. And started to maneuver it right into it's rightful spot over the open hood. He was taking in a deep breath to calm his excitement. He could celebrate after he had put it in. He focused everything in his mind to the task at hand. As he prepared to make the engine start it's slow and complex path into its rightful place.

 _Uuuuurrrrrrk!_

Cyborg looked down at his gut, where the unexpected sound had come from. "Aw c'mon stomach! Can't you tell I'm a little busy here! Bother me some other time!"

 _Uuuuuuuuuuuurrrrrrrrrrrrrkkkkk!_

Cyborg widened his eyes at the longer sound. Was he really that hungry? He could have sworn he had breakfast like ten hours ago. He just shrugged to himself as he prepared to get to work.

 _UUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUJUUUUURRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRKKKKKKKKKKKKKK!_

Cyborg stared down at his gut in complete shock. Then he huffed a little angrily as he gave in. "Fine, I'll go get you something to eat. But then we're heading straight back down here when we're done!" He shouted down at his gut. It made no noise to acknowledge him since stomachs can't talk. He huffed again as turned around and walked out of one of two doors to the garage. Wondering why his stomach would bother him then.

A little after Cyborg left, Beast Boy came charging in through the other door on the other side of the garage. Excitement was clearly written all over his green face.

"Dude! Did you hear what came in the mail…" He looked around the garage. Realizing he wasn't seeing or hearing anyone in there. "... today?" He said confused. He looked around again, seeing no half human, half metal best friend in sight.

"Where did he go? I could have sworn he said he was going to be in the garage all day if anyone needed him." Beast Boy said as he started walking around the large garage.

A minute later, he was just about ready to give up and go back into the Tower. Deciding he'd just play the new Super Monkeys XVI game all by himself. When he saw the engine still dangling in the air above the T-Car.

The shiny sleek appearance, the way it looked so cool, and many other hidden factors seemed to draw him straight towards it. Like a moth to the bright light of the bug zapper. Would the results be the same?

He got close to it, far closer than what Cyborg would ever allow for him. ' _Dude! What the hell is this cool thing supposed to be?'_ Beast Boy thought to himself. Not having a clue as to what it really was, since he wasn't really an auto mechanic (Then again, neither am I).

Beast Boy took a look at the engine, and then the car underneath it. He saw the big gap in all the mechanics beneath the open hood. And figured that this had to be where this cool looking piece of machinery went.

' _Hmm, maybe if I did this for Chrome Dome, he might let me drive the T-Car! Oh man, I can't believe it!'_

Beast Boy became lost in a fantasy world for a moment. Imagining himself driving Cyborg's beloved all throughout the city. Maybe wearing a wicked pair of sunglasses as he had his arm across his pale girlfriend. Using the T-Car as the ride she had wanted for their date later this week. How grateful she'd be that it wasn't some shoddy rental. What she might do with him to thank him for this...

Oh, he was so not letting this opportunity pass up.

Beast Boy didn't know it had to go in an exact way. That it had to take a specific way down into the car to ensure that there would be no problems. He didn't know about all the cool gadgets that were in it.

He just knew that it looked like that one empty area was where this cool piece of tech belonged. And that he was being fueled by fantasies of the future.

Despite all the warnings his best bud had ever given him on not doing anything to his baby. From driving it, to sometimes even so much as looking at it. Even going as far as saying he better not even be thinking about his baby.

Beast Boy decided he would help his best bud out. With his very own magic touch at that.

Beast Boy grabbed the precious engine from off its perch. His strong arms easily handling the weight. He didn't seem to take into account that Cyborg was even stronger than him. Otherwise, he might not have done what he did next. As he positioned the DCL-300 over the gap in the mechanics.

And slammed the engine into its rightful compartment. Not knowing about the heat seeking missiles placed at the bottom of it.

' **KA-** _ **Boom!'**_

Cyborg was just walking in through the doorway with a very big sub sandwich positioned in his mouth. He had just been preparing to take a very large bite out of it. When a bright light filled his vision, and the sound hit his ears.

When the light and confusion cleared, the sandwich dropped onto the floor. Cyborg's jaw along with it. His human eye widened to comical proportions.

Beast Boy still had his hands held down in front of him. Where the previously intact engine had been in his hands.

Now, he was holding on to two pipes of the said engine. Each of them black, but were certainly not shiny anymore. In fact, the whole front of his uniform was black as well. His back side was covered in dust. But Cyborg wasn't looking at his green bro.

The T-Car was destroyed. Completely, and utterly. The back tires were glued to the ceiling. The roof of it was on the floor by the charred burning remains of the undercarriage. The front tires were melted into the floor. And the precious DCL-300, the engine that had costed him an arm and a leg, literally, was in the back corner. The opposite corner. Sticking out of the walls. And in small pieces all over the floor.

Beast Boy finally seemed to recover. As he chuckled lightly to himself. This had definitely not been in his fantasies of when he set the thing in the gap.

"Heh, heh, hey Cy… what's new with you today?" Beast Boy said in a light tone.

Another explosion went off behind him. Likely one of the missiles that hadn't been impacted by the engine from the initial contact. It sent Beast Boy a foot in the air out of fright.

Unfortunately, that explosion also made Cyborg come to his senses. As he finally pieced two and two together inside his mind.

Beast Boy.

Parts of special DCL-300 Engine in Beast Boy's hands.

Baby still burning on the ground in front of Beast Boy.

Beast Boy looking guilty as hell.

Beast Boy…

Beast Boy…

Beast Boy…

DESTROYED HIS BABY!

Beast Boy started to slowly back away as he saw his friend's cybernetic eye glow a bright red. He was starting to fear for his life at this point. "Hey, buddy, it was just a car and a weird doohickey. Can't we just try to talk this out like civilized people?" Beast Boy asked.

A heavy set missile assembly popped out of Cyborg's back, arms, legs, and even chest. Each area filled with dozens of heat seeking missiles. All of which were now lined up and targeted to go after Beast Boy's heat signature. His eye became a brighter red as his own personal targeting system started up.

"Prepare to be terminated grass stain!" Cyborg said a little too calmly for all the weaponry he was showing.

Beast Boy, knowing when to take a hint, did the only thing he could think of that would let him live.

He morphed into a cheetah and ran the hell out of that room through the doorway he had came in from. A very angry, pissed, grieving, and full on terminator Cyborg chasing right after him. While the car continued to burn away in the garage.

Raven was going to be so mad with him for not getting them a ride for their date later that week. He'd have to deal with her wrath on that later though.

For now, he'd have to survive Cyborg's missile blazing wrath.

Heh, so much for that magic touch.

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 **Author's Notes:**

 **Yeah, that was funny there. Making Cyborg go all Terminator at the loss of his baby.**

 **So like I said, the next ideas to this will be yours. Whatever tickles your funny bone so to speak. This is going to be a fic based on what you guys want. Within reason of course. A man has to draw the line somewhere.**

 **Also, I should mention I have a poll going. It's a list of all the stories I've ever written on this site. I want to know which ones you guys have liked the most.**

 **So if you like this, I suggest you favorite this. If you want to see more, I suggest you follow this. And if you have some crazy idea you'd like to see written out, hit that damn review button! You will receive credit for that idea! I will take nothing from it except the pleasure of writing it out!**

 **Till Next Time**

 **Allen**


	2. The T-Cepticon (RPGPersona)

**Alright, I'm doing the ideas based on a random number generator in the order they were reviewed. It gave me a two, so here is RPGPersona's idea! (Not sure how long I'll go with the random generator, it depends on how high the ideas for this piles up). Also, just so you know, I think the beginning here is funny, the ending... not so much.**

 **RPGPersona may not be an author, but he has been there from the very start of my writing career on this site. He was the first person to ever review one of my stories. And he always gives a nice summary of the chapters I write. Sometimes making me realize that I put in something that I didn't realize. So here's to you buddy!**

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 **Disclaimer:** **I don't own Teen Titans. And if Cyborg ever finds this, I am screwed!**

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 **Number Two:** _The T-Cepticon (By RPGPersona)_

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 _Inside a video game store_

"Hahaha, it is I, your number one nemesis, Control Freak!" A big fat nerdy guy said to the Teen Titans.

"I thought our number one nemesis was Slade?" Beast Boy said while scratching his head in confusion.

"Aw c'mon! I'm around much more often than that big oaf ever is! And I'm so much cooler than he ever could be anyways!" Control Freak said indignantly.

"Sure… a super fat couch potato with a TV remote is a bigger threat to us than an ex-military and heartless serial killer." Raven's sarcastic monotone filled the air.

"Hey! I can be heartless too when I want to be! Watch!" He said, pointing his remote at a TV that was showing an ad for Kingdom Hearts III. One button click later, and a literal small black shadowed Heartless jumped from the screen.

"Behold!" He shouted in a glorified manner. Pointing out his creation with a look of awe in his eyes.

"What am I supposed to be looking at here?" Raven questioned with a raised eyebrow, while Beast Boy just laughed.

"Dude! That is like the weakest thing in that game! Every person on this planet that has ever played the games knows that!" Beast Boy said as he continued to laugh.

Robin and Starfire just raised their eyebrows at the small creature. As it clawed at the air in front of it. It was… kind of cute.

A blue sonic blast went right through the shadow heartless. Completely destroying it.

"I'm sorry, what are we supposed to be seeing here?" Cyborg asked in an amused tone, as he pointed his sonic cannon at the villain. Who visibly paled at what had just happened to his heartless.

"This!" Control Freak shouted. As he pointed his remote at another display. This time of the Master Chief from Halo 5.

The Master Chief unhooked his blaster from his back, and aimed it at the Titans. Looking deadly as he did so. "Ha! Now with the Master Chief at my side, you won't even stand a-" Control Freak started to say.

Again, another blue sonic cannon blast ripped right through the cardboard display. Completely disintegrating the entire thing. Control Freak stared in shock at Cyborg, who blew some imaginary smoke from his sonic cannon.

"I'm sorry man, did your chief take a bathroom break or something, because I don't see him anywhere!" Cyborg yelled, before he started to laugh, along with Beast Boy. Even Robin was chuckling a little. While Raven and Starfire looked amused.

Control Freak glared hard at Cyborg, then pointed his remote at another display. This time of a samurai. "Let's see-"

Another sonic cannon blast destroyed it.

"What about-" He tried a cash register.

Sonic cannon blast.

"This looks threatening-" A pink Kerby.

Sonic cannon blast.

"What does that do-" The table for the cash register.

(Sing song voice) Sonic cannon blast.

Soon, all the items around the fat nerd were destroyed. Every creation he had tried to bring to life had been useless against the technological Titan and his trusty sonic cannon.

Cyborg had a clear smirk on his face. "Face it man, I can destroy everything you try to throw at me." Cyborg said in a smug voice.

One last evil idea came into Control Freak's head. "Well Cyborg! Since you seem so keen on destroying all my creations, how about I give you a taste of your own medicine!" He said, as he pointed his remote towards the windows, where the T-Car was parked in front of the store. Control Freak grinned evilly as he pressed a button on his remote, and a purple blast came from it.

Cyborg looked to the area he was pointing at, and a long comical "Nooooooo…" came from his mouth, as he jumped towards the area where the blast from the remote was passing through. Even though he was going to be too late in blocking it.

The other Titans, as if in slow motion, followed the path of the purple blast coming from Control Freak's remote, all the way to the T-Car. A loud thud came from Cyborg, as he hit the ground. He looked up at his baby, his wonderful technological baby. As the purple blast enveloped it.

The car instantly started to shift. With the tires moving from their spots, to appear on the back of the changing machine. The hood opened up while the engine inside shifted towards the inside of the growing machine. The opened hood changed shape until it looked like an armored helmet. The body of the car changed to the point where it didn't even resemble a car. Instead, it looked more like an oversized robot. With an armored blue colored torso, arms and legs that could flex in any direction, and a variety of weapons at its disposal.

Finally, underneath the helmet, a pair of glowing red eyes appeared. And locked onto the shocked Titans inside the store. The T-Car turned killer machine let out a small growl as it stood at over twenty feet tall, and a right shoulder hatch opened up. Showing a silo of missiles, armed and ready to fire. "Destroy the Teen Titans!" It said in a loud mechanical voice.

"Good luck destroying your T-Car Cy! Or should I say, my T-Cepticon!" Control Freak laughed in an evil voice, before he hit a button on his remote, and he was teleported into a TV screen. He ran off across the TV waves, getting away.

"Dudes, he's getting away!" Beast Boy shouted.

"We'll deal with him later. Right now, we have to destroy that car!" Robin shouted to his team.

"Wait, what!" Cyborg shouted in shock.

The T-Cepticon fired an array of missiles through the windows at the Titans. Forcing their leader's hand.

"Titans! Go!" Robin shouted. As all the Titans but Cyborg moved from their spots.

The missiles all missed their targets, Cyborg being just because he was plain lucky. And the missiles hit the back of the store. Blowing off the back wall.

The Titans, minus Cyborg, charged out of the store to fight the machine. While he still stood in blank shock inside the now destroyed store.

Robin threw a bird a rang at the things chest, as he grabbed two discs to throw at the things feet. The bird a rang barely even scratched the paint job, while the machine jumped back, making the discs hit the ground and explode. Robin barely grabbed his bird a rang from the air and pulled his cape up in time to block the machine gun fire the T-Cepticon sent at him through its right wrist.

Beast Boy pounced on the things right wrist as a tiger while it was distracted. Giving Robin time to fall back to a safer position. Beast Boy succeeded in tearing out the hidden machine guns it had in its right wrist compartment. But the T-Cepticon only growled in frustration as it threw the green tiger off, and proceed to fire the machine guns in its left wrist at it.

The tiger was covered in a black dome of power, and all the bullets bounced off it. The machine stopped firing as confusion overtook it. And then another sphere of black power surrounded the T-Cepticon's left wrist. Ripping out several of the weapons inside it.

The machine looked up to see Raven floating in the air, and judging by the blackness that surrounded her, she was the cause of the black power. The thing fired more of its missiles from its shoulder, all of them aimed at the empath. Who lost her concentration when she saw the missiles coming right at her.

Several starbolts and eye lasers lit up the air, each one intercepting a missile in mid air. Making it look like the Fourth of July had came early. The machine looked up just as a rather ferocious looking Starfire crashed into its chest with a ferocious war cry.

Her glowing hands ripping deep into the missile silos in its shoulder. Tearing them to the point where it wouldn't be able to use it. The machine roared in anger, as it moved it's large hand and swatted her off its armored chest. She flew through the air into another building. A cloud of dust obscured the area she landed in.

"Starfire!" Robin shouted as he chased after his girlfriend to make sure she was alright.

The machine opened up another compartment in it's chest, as it locked onto the running leader with a heat seeking missile. When a green panther suddenly appeared in its vision. The panther dug its claws right through the helmet and into one of its red glowing eyes.

This only irritated the T-Cepticon further as the machine snarled and snapped its head from side to side to dislodge the panther. The panther held on for a few seconds, before one particularly wild jerk launched it through the air into another building. A cloud of dust obscured where he had been thrown into the building as well.

The T-Cepticon turned in time to see the one called Raven flying towards where Beast Boy had burst through the building. She said nothing, yet her face was that of pure fear and concern. The machine chuckled to itself as it prepared to fire it's other missile compartment at her this time. Now that her other three teammates were quite distracted.

A blue beam of light split the air, hitting the machine directly on a missile it had been about to fire. The missile exploded in its chest, making the T-Cepticon fall to one knee. It's chest was clearly damaged from the blast.

It looked up with anger in its one remaining eye at the person who had shot it. And was now standing in front of the store right now. Sonic cannon raised and primed to fire.

"You don't have to do this baby! I know there is still good in you!" Cyborg shouted at it.

"Must… destroy… Titans…" It said again in a slow voice, as it started to open up a hatch on its back. It showed a countdown timer to a bomb that would blow up the whole block. It read one minute and counting.

"Please! You don't have to do this! I can fix you up again! Make you into the best car ever!" Cyborg shouted in a desperate voice.

 _55, 54, 53…_

"Creator… ordered… destruction… can't… go… against… creator…" The T-Cepticon said.

"But I'm your original creator! I made you from the parts of my body! Doesn't that count for something!" Cyborg shouted.

 _32, 31, 30…_

"Can't… go… against… creator's… orders... I… have… no… choice… … please… destroy… me… I… don't… want… this… original... creator… promise… me..." The T-Cepticon said, in a softer mechanical voice than before.

 _15, 14, 13…_

Cyborg sniffed. "I promise, I'll remake you! Better than ever before!"

Under the helmet, it looked like the T-Cepticon was smiling. "Thank… you… original... creator…" It said, as it closed its eye.

 _5, 4, 3…_

Cyborg sniffed, as he looked away.

His sonic cannon fired. As the shot traveled through the air... all on its own.

Right through the helmet of the T-Cepticon.

 _2, 1…_ … _1_

The countdown on the bomb stopped at one. As the remains of the T-Cepticon laid in a smoking ruin in the middle of the parking lot.

Robin came out of a building supporting Starfire, while Raven came out of another supporting Beast Boy. All of them saw Cyborg in front of his baby. Crying his eyes out as he grieved over it.

The Titans said nothing, as they all moved to be around Cyborg, and surrounded him with a comforting hug. Cyborg continued to bawl his eyes out late into the night at the destruction of his baby, by his own hands. While Beast Boy, Raven, Robin, and Starfire comforted him in his time of grief.

Control Freak had better watch out next time he faced the Titans.

Cyborg just might aim for him first when the time came.

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 **Author's Notes:**

 **Crap, I wanted to go for funny, but it was really angsty there at the end… oh well, such is life.**

 **Thanks again to RPGPersona for the idea! I hope he, and others will like it! As a reminder, I am still accepting more ideas! The random number generator will be pulled again soon! So watch out for your ideas fellow authors and readers!**

 **Till Next Time**

 **Allen**


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